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Writer's pictureCarrie Aalberts

Don't Ghost: Show Up for Loved Ones Dealing with Dementia

Halloween often brings tales of ghosts and witches, but there’s a real-life haunting that many face—being “ghosted” by friends and family after a dementia diagnosis. The fear, confusion, and isolation that accompany such a diagnosis can feel overwhelming. This Halloween, let’s unmask the stigma and understand why it’s crucial to stay present for our loved ones.

Why People Ghost

It’s not uncommon to feel unsure about how to act when someone we care about is diagnosed with dementia. Fear of saying the wrong thing, discomfort with the changes, or simply not knowing how to help can lead people to withdraw. However, distancing ourselves only adds to the isolation our loved ones may feel. Do not worry about messing up, showing up is EVERYTHING. Showing up is appreciated.


The Importance of Showing Up

  1. Maintain Human Connection: Human interaction is vital for mental and emotional health. Regular contact can provide comfort, familiarity, and reduce feelings of loneliness.

  2. Create Meaningful Experiences: Small gestures, like a phone call or a visit, can create moments of joy and connection. These interactions are beneficial not only for the person living with dementia but also for the caregiver, who can feel supported and less isolated.

  3. Support Emotional Well-being: Consistent presence reassures your loved one that they are valued and loved. It helps them feel secure and less anxious about their changing abilities.

How to Stay Present

  • Engage with Empathy: Approach each interaction with kindness and patience. Be sensitive to their emotions and listen actively to what they wish to share. Enter their world!

  • Adapt to Their Needs: As dementia progresses, communication may become challenging. Use simple words, maintain eye contact, and be patient if they struggle to express themselves.

  • Participate in Activities Together: Whether it’s reminiscing over old photos or enjoying a simple walk in the park, shared activities can foster a sense of togetherness and joy.

  • Be Consistent: Regular visits or calls, even brief ones, can make a significant difference. Schedule these interactions to establish a routine, providing your loved one with something to look forward to.


Supporting Caregivers

Remember, caregivers need support too. Offer to help with tasks, provide respite care, or simply lend an ear when they need to talk. Your presence is a gift on this often unseen journey.


Thank you for showing up!


Peace and love,

Carrie aka Dementia Darling


Check out 2 of my recent social media posts!👻⬇️⬇️



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